On Being Present for James Jett

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I can’t believe this little guy is already almost four months old. Everything they say about parenthood is true and more…more incredible, more humbling, more awe-inspiring, and more loving than I could’ve ever imagined or hope for. Even though I’m a proud auntie of seven sweet, rambunctious nieces and nephews, I never thought I could ever love being a mom so much. I’ll admit it’s not so much being a mom, but being his mom that’s changed the entire game for me.

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Ever watched the movie, “What to Expect when You’re Expecting?” It follows the birth stories of different women. There are some women who remain fit as a fiddle during pregnancy and literally fart out a baby. And then, there are women who get every symptom imaginable and then have complications during labor. I was the latter with the morning sickness, swollen feet, aggressive work schedule. I was an all around slob!

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I’d gladly share our dramatic birth story in depth with you over tea one day, but to make a long story short: his first week wasn’t easy. I carried small for most of my pregnancy, which somehow affected his birth weight. James was born 5lbs and spent his first week in the NICU, or neo-natal intensive care unit, due to hypoglycemia. It was heart wrenching seeing this little guy have to endure feedings through his nose and have to get blood drawn every three hours.  Throughout everything I was amazed to see him remain calm, alert, and even happy. I fed off his strength and energy. I can’t tell you how much joy I felt when his little eyes lit up at the sound of my voice. The whole mother-child bonding thing is mind boggling. 

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Fast forward four months and you really can’t tell this guy was ever considered small for his age! He’s more than tripled his birth weight and is clear of almost all the complications! We just have a minor procedure to work through in a couple months. He’s still so calm, alert, incredibly happy and even keeled. Everyday I wonder how on earth we got so lucky! Sure, I can do without the 3AM feedings, but for him (and only him lol) I just don’t mind. Who am I?! 

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That first week flew by but the past four months have flown by even faster. It’s been a struggle peeling myself away from him to focus on work, social obligations, my health, relationships, and blogggggging. I know I’ll have to get back into the swing of things eventually, but honestly, I just don’t want to miss these early stages. I have been so go-go-go my entire life, I’m thinking this is the perfect reason to CTFO, slow my roll, and be present. So, this is my half-ass apology for the lack of updates but I hope my absence makes sense. I know the mommies out there understand. 

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